I thought that, instead of boring you with the minutiae of my job, as I probably did in my last post, I would tell you why I became a nurse in the first place and why I chose Lady Sybil Crawley as my nom de plume.

Not to completely turn you off, but I truly believe that I have been called to this profession by God. I know many people will read that last and move on, believing me to be some sort of religious zealot or some egoist who believes herself to be the reincarnation of Florence Nightingale. I promise that I am neither. I promise.

I am what my college referred to as a "Nontraditional" student, by which they meant to imply that I am "old," but were trying to be politically correct. What they really meant was that I was not entering college in my late teens or early 20's like the majority of the student body. However, I was not alone in this. At least 30% of my class was made up of "Nontraditional" students, so I felt very comfortable going back to school.

I used to be a traditional student and do in fact have a Bachelor of Arts in another subject that in no way prepares me for a job. In order to make use of my first degree, I would have to obtain a PH.D. in that subject. So, I graduated and worked in retail until I met Mr. Right, got married, and had my first child, at which point I elected to be a stay-at-home mom.

I am very blessed in that my husband's income allowed me to make the choice to become a stay-at-home mom. In fact, it turned out to be an absolute necessity because our first child was born with a medical condition that took nearly the first three years of his life to diagnose properly. We spent a lot of time in the hospital with him. You can see where this is going.

During this time, I watched the medical staff caring for him very closely. The doctors would dash in and out. They were usually with us for no more than 2-3 minutes at a time. They then went and wrote a few new orders in my son's chart and left. It was the nurses who then carried out those orders, gave my son his medicine, and made him well. Yes, their actions were directed by the doctors, but the nurses were the ones who took the time to explain to me what was going on, why they were doing what they were doing, and hugged me when I cried.

With good medical care and years of therapy, my son got better and began to thrive. We had a second child, a little girl who is very healthy. Then, the littlest one went off to school and I grew bored with housework and volunteering. I desperately needed to be intellectually stimulated and emotionally fulfilled. I want to be able to look back on my life, when I am a very old woman, and know that I made some sort of difference in the world.

And, so, I became a nurse.

It was one of the hardest things I have ever done in my life, and I am only just getting started.

I know you're wondering how God plays into this scenario. First, he gave me a sick child so I would know what it feels to be on the other side of the coin, so that I would have empathy for my patients and their families. Then, he cleared the path. From the moment I decided to return to school for nursing, everything was laid out smoothly before me.

I applied to the school of my choice and was accepted within two weeks. I went to the student counselor who was very blunt and told me that there was no way I would be accepted into the nursing program with the 3.2 GPA I transferred in on and that I would need to make a 4.0 in my pre-nursing courses to stand a chance of being accepted into the nursing program. I worked harder than I have ever worked in school before and maintained a 4.0.

My program has 135 openings in the nursing program each Fall and Spring semester and 85 each Summer semester. We are told that they get nearly 1200 applications each semester and that, even with a 4.0, we should be prepared to apply 2 to 3 times before being accepted. I was accepted on my first attempt. I am sure my age and the fact that I already had a degree made the difference for me.

Once in the program, people dropped like flies. There is a very high attrition rate. Many people enter for the wrong reasons and, after realizing how hard it is to make it through the program, change majors. Many just fail out. I made it through and graduated Magna Cum Laude. It was the hardest thing I have ever done. This from someone who went through natural childbirth twice.

I graduated in May, passed the NCLEX in June, was hired at the hospital that was my first choice in July, and started my career in August. Compared with so many of the stories I've heard from other nurses, my journey to become a nurse was a cakewalk.

And now the real journey begins...

So, what's with the nom de plume? I LOVE the Masterpiece Theater production of Downton Abbey. Lady Sybil Crawley is the youngest daughter of the Earl and Countess of Grantham. I relate to her because, like me, she does not HAVE to work, but is blessed to in the position of being able to CHOOSE to work and, like me, she has found her calling as a nurse.

The same is true of Florence Nightingale and many other early pioneers in the field of nursing. Many had very comfortable lives which they chose to abandon to the higher calling that is nursing. Not that I place myself, in any way, in their league. However, Flo as a nom de plume seems too obvious. A friend suggested Clara Barton, and she would have been an excellent choice. However, Lady Sybil is a character that I can relate to who is also a relatively new heroine on the nursing scene, although she is a fictitious heroine and Flo and Clara were both very real. Plus she's very new, and very green, and so am I.

But, why a nom de plume at all? Because it allows me to have a voice and say what I want to say while at the same time protecting myself, my employer, and my patients. As Lady Sybil I will be able to tell you many outrageous tales from the bedside as long as I am very careful to protect my patients' right to privacy and not include any information that would make my patient identifiable. No names, and only enough details to tell the story, not enough that the patient would even be able to identify him or herself as the subject were he or she to stumble upon my blog. Who doesn't like a good story? And I have so many!

And there you have it all: Why I became a nurse, and why I am writing in disguise. I hope you don't think this makes me disingenuous. I am not trying to be a sneak or be false, just be able to blog openly, which I could never do under my own name, sadly.

Well, I've kept you from whatever it is you're supposed to be doing long enough. Thanks for listening. I have to work 2 13 hour shifts over the next few days, so I won't be able to blog until Saturday or Sunday.

Until then, I remain,
Lady Sybil Crawley

PS
I don't look a thing like the beautiful actress that plays the role of Lady Sybil in the series. Too bad. She's so lovely!